Friendship and a Birthday in Berlin…
Friendship is a peculiar thing. Two people meet and they might as well be sitting on opposite ends of the globe. Two others meet and it’s as if they knew each other their entire lives. And then there are those who develop bonds slowly, incrementally, to form lasting friendships that endure a lifetime. Whatever the way, friendship is among the best gifts that life can give.
My time in Berlin is almost over, or vorbei as the Germans say. Having lived here in the early 1990’s, after the then 1989 demise of the infamous Berlin Wall, my voyage to Berlin meant more than just a visit to the old haunts of this now modern, avant-garde, historical metropolis. It was a voyage of friendship and a voyage of celebration.
This past week saw the 9th birthday of my god-daughter Rosa, and having recently celebrated my 50th, it was a compelling reason for a trip back to the German capital. To have a god-daughter is a special event, but it’s even more special when it’s the result of a friendship dating back some 25 years prior.
When my good friend and his wife asked me some nine years ago to be the godfather of their newborn baby daughter, little did I think that this would be the result of a French language course in Paris almost 16 years earlier? It was there in a classroom that Rosa’s father and I became good friends, and although career paths took us to opposite sides of the world, a friendship remained. So when the question came of becoming Rosa’s godfather, I was not only surprised, but felt honored. It also made me think of what friendship is.
Quotes abound over the meaning of friendship, and books without end have been written about it, but what does it truly mean? What is this thing that strangely keeps people connected, without regard to distance and time? Is it having things and interests in common? Is it the verbal sparring and bantering that often goes along with it? Or is it having someone to discuss the important issues of the day with?
Yes, perhaps these and many other things make for a great friendship, but ultimately, there’s one ingredient to be found at the core of every great friendship, and that ingredient is trust (see To Trust or Not to Trust?). For without trust, friendship cannot exist. The ability to trust, and to be trusted, is the driver behind all successful friendships. Trust predicates respect, and respect predicates boundaries, and boundaries are the guardians of friendship.
English playwright John Webster (1578-1634) wrote, “Lay this unto your breast: Old friends, like old swords, still are trusted best.”
It was true in Webster’s time, and it’s true in ours. Friends are a beautiful part of life. Without them, the brightest path can seem dark; but with them, the darkest path can seem bright.
A thought I gladly ponder, as I pack my bags for the flight home…
For more, check out The C.A.T. Principle: Change, Action, Trust – Words to Live By, a Global Ebook Awards GOLD Winner for Best Self-Help Non-Fiction Ebook of 2014, available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble. See the latest Amazon reviews here. Now revised and expanded, and once again nominated for the Best Self-Help Non-Fiction Ebook of the 2015 Global Ebook Awards!
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A 2014 Global Ebook Awards GOLD Winner for Best Non-fiction Self-help Ebook.
2015 Global Ebook Awards Nominee for Best Self-Help Non-Fiction Ebook
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